Do you feel free to be yourself in your marriage?

Many people try very hard to impress their partners at the beginning of their relationship. Some even go as far as changing their personality and pretending to be something they are not.

However, after marriage these couples let loose and revert to their real selves. This can easily be misinterpreted to be an abrupt personality change when all along they were hiding whom they truly are.

In marriage, it’s always best to remain true to yourself. You are able to do what you want when you want and allow your partner to do the same.

Being Yourself Means . . .

Being yourself means being genuine about your feelings and in your behavior. Hiding your feelings and concerns may keep your marriage peaceful for a short while, but sooner or later the truth will come out. It’s better to voice your concerns immediately as they arise and avoid misunderstandings in the future. This way, you can build an honest, sincere and healthy relationship.

Why you should be yourself

The price you pay for not being true to yourself is not enjoying your marriage. When you go too far out of your way to accommodate your partner, you destroy any possibility of a healthy, intimate relationship.  You end up feeling dissatisfied, angry and frustrated, wondering why you are putting so much effort into the relationship and getting very little satisfaction out of it.  It is also quite difficult to be happily married when your relationship with your spouse is built on a shaky foundation.

How to stay true to yourself in a relationship

• Keep your hobbies and any other activities that were important to you before. Just because you now have mutual hobbies as a couple doesn’t mean you should no longer enjoy your favorite sport or book club.

• Keep your old friends. If you feel the need to let go of your old friends because you are now married, you are probably not being yourself. You’ll need someone else – other than your partner – to vent to every now and then.

• Spend time away from your partner preferably with friends or family. Being married doesn’t mean you should be together all the time. A little time away from each other is good for you and your relationship. After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder!

• Speak Up – Don’t shy away from bringing up issues about your marriage for fear of rocking the boat. Ignoring it won’t make it go away.

Marriage can get frustrating very fast when you are pretending to be someone whom you are not under the mistaken belief that it will bring happiness in your relationship. Follow these few tips, to be yourself and enjoy a happy marriage.